One of those days.

Everyone has those kind of days.


     Where all they want to do is either sleep, eat, or just be lazy. That's what today was like. Using sleeping pills so the sleep so you wouldn't have a nightmare involved. These kind of days make you realize things and also make you think. Being home alone has no distractions but the ones you make. Like the tv or anything you try. But you can't be distracted the whole time, when your stuck in a house in sickness, which is all tied up with the emotions you have been feeling for awhile.

   The days where you listen to songs that make you feel something, that make you have a tear in your eye or just make you wanna scream. Those days where sleep seems like all you want to do even though you are scared to dream. The days where you realize you can't do this forever, that you need to just try a little bit harder and maybe if you keep postive, everything will get better slowly. But sometimes you need it to happen fast, not slowly. Why fast? Just for your own well being. So you don't spend days like this, blaming yourself for the hell you have been through. Wondering what you did to deserve something like this. To sit and see things on tv that make you wanna cry and just give up. But you have the good thoughts, for example, this is for the best, everything happens for a reason. The things you should be thinking, the things people keep telling you so you will feel better, but doesn't seem to be working out well. The one day where you need someone to talk to and everyone seems to ignore you.

The days where you feel like you are just falling down and down throughout the day.

The day where you realize you have to just go at life and live like your dying.

The day where you realize if something is meant to happen, it will.

The day where you realize that this was all to make you a stronger being.

The day where you think about how to stop something like this happening again.

The day where you tell yourself to never give your heart to someone fully again, until you say 'I do'.

The day where you just give up and wait for time to show what happens.

The days where you try and understand what has happened, what is happening.

The day where you become stronger, even though you will have more days where you just break down and cry for hours. Which is only human.

"Go on and try to tear me down, I will be rising from the ground, like a skyscraper." Skyscraper by Demi Lovato.